What I Know Following YEARS of Research

What I've learned following years of research: https://sites.google.com › site › loretosfamily

NO ONE CARES. HARSH?

What I've found for most families who have history available online no matter the volume like my link above or if it's only a family tree or maybe a few photos or documents... few care.

If it's a paid service whereby you can only view the information by subscribing NO ONE pays. The person who is paying to create what can often be a wealth of unknown history (as above) is usually the only person who sees it.

WHY? Simple. Read on...

EVERYTHING IS FREE. Just click the link above & you'll understand. But FREE doesn't mean SEE. Making it ALL FREE doesn't generate the interest it should.

Here's the problem...

When researching family generally most relatives found have since passed away or of an age where they are not online or to a much lesser degree.

The very people who would enjoy history most are either deceased or too old to view it. But I also found showcasing documents or articles, images & videos of those younger be it in their 20's-70's generated only slightly more interest but that too quickly subsided. 

If you don't view history that is of YOU who is?

As generations pass the further away the next generation gets from their family history.

CASE IN POINT

My grandchildren never knew mine or my wifes parents. They would be their great grandparents but no matter how many photos or stories shared with them, they're just kids. Their world is made up of playing, playing, having snacks & playing. They have no connection to their great grandparents.

Once the physical connection is lost the greater the disconnect.

We live in a society where every second is captured & is as quickly buried by the next post. 

We have never had more archiving history than we now do & that's the problem. 

IT'S ALL ABOUT NOW & NOW BECOMES THE PAST.... RIGHT NOW. 

You no sooner post to any one of the social media platforms & your post is HISTORY seconds later buried by millions of others posting about themselves & by yourself as you post again & again &....

Lastly most reading this only have images/videos stored only on their phone &/or on a social media platform. One hack & they're gone. One issue with your phone & they're gone. No one is taking photos with a film camera or using a movie film or video camera.

There is no proof backed up means saved. It is more than likely decades from now photos & videos taken today will not open even when stored on the best of back up drives as the drive itself or its platform will long be outdated & no longer compatible. Or maybe it would've worked had it not been left for decades in the damp basement, garage, attic...

One corrupt file can infect every file or the drive itself making external drive data unreadable. Video files are most likely not going to playback.

NOTHING compares to the physical

As a collector of history I've held in my hands documents from the 1600s, photos from the 1800s & home movies from the 1920s. No one is "holding,"any image or video in their hands now& without physical evidence we're history.

 
 

Be Persistent Be Patient Be Surpised

In older posts I tell of the inability to find my father's parents & their son Donato coming from Italy to NY.
I searched. I mean I SEARCHED. Years looking only to come up empty.
As of this posting the blog is now twelve years old & that's about how long I've looked for my grandparents.
Three others searched. A cousin on my father's side, a genealogist from Ancestry, & my wife each tried & only to see the same result.
This week for no reason other than just looking around I signed into my free familysearch.org account. 
I did nothing more than I had before. If anything I was actually quite casual about searching only to get the hit I waited years to receive.
There was my grandmother Orazia (aka Grazia/Grace) with her son Donato entering the US in 1906.

Stunned? Surprised? More like a Sigh...of relief. FINALLY. 
I was always told they like millions of immigrants entered thru the NY harbor especially since they lived in the city. Maybe they entered thru Boston by chance, possibly boarding the next available ship
which was docking in Boston. Maybe they entered because other family or friends lived in that area. That I will never know & as of today I have two different documents featuring a Carmine Tocci entering Boston 1903. It was not uncommon for a husband to come first to America to pay for his wife & family's tickets months to years later.
The post below features a photo of my grandmother just found this year including the death record
of infant Augelo or Angelo. (There were two who passed away. Americo was the first in 1910). He was found in the 1915 Census & than disappears. Sadly we find out why & quite honestly I do not recall hearing about him.
While I'm still searching for Carmine I am now nearly complete in my ancestral research (excluding near impossible to obtain Italian documents pertaining to births & marriages)
Be persistent. Be Patient. Be Surprised.

 

Grandma Grace (Grazia Gentile) Tocci & Baby Aurgelo (Angelo) Found

There is little known about my father's parents you can read their history here:

https://get.google.com/albumarchive/102260807874318515063/album/AF1QipPJ13xvL1tE0qF-K_9d7UR-cAcj6JRIYAasitUv 

& to view everything click here:

https://sites.google.com/site/loretosfamily/

That being said because she entered Wingdale (Hospital/Mental Institution) by the early 1930s suffering from Dementia at least 10 years prior to being admitted adding to that living a 

hard life 

"dirt poor" in an abusive marriage did not make for a wonderful life & photos of her became impossible to find until a cousin recently located them in an album

These photos appear to be taken in a suburban area it is certainly not NYC & I doubt it's Wingdale She had a brother in Newton MA maybe these were taken at his home or another relative they also "feel," like Florida but based on her age I do not know how she would've been anywhere that far during her stay at Wingdale (Where she remained until her death in 1954)

My father very much resembled her as shown in the bottom photo something most did not know

She died two years before I was born & with her passing also died much of what we knew as my Father rarely spoke of her I do not know how often he visited her or if she recalled who he was but we now have a face to put with a name a face long lost I do know who the woman is standing next to her

The document below is a 1915 death certificate for a one year old infant named Augelo or Angelo Tocci a baby listed in the 1915 NYC Census (you can see that & all of their info & history by going to the link at the top of this post & clicking on Tocci Documents & Tocci History) In 1910 I found a baby Americo who died as an infant following that years census

Two years later in 1912 my father was born & named Americo.  In 1915 my then three year old father along with his parents & siblings  are featured at this time with Augelo in that years census however Augelo is never seen again nor did my father ever mention him but as a toddler he may have forgotten about him but like his mother Grace he is found

Italian Sunday Dinner Tradition Dies Like Family

Your family most likely has a tradition or traditions. They often evolve around holidays possibly vacations and (almost) always food.
Most families who migrated to the U.S. brought not only with them their origin but tradition.
Italian's often had a huge Sunday dinner.
While it centered around immediate family your aunts, uncles, cousins, friends even friends of friends
were welcomed (Sound familiar?).
Sunday dinner was EVERY Sunday and most family showed every time. 
FOOD! FOOD! FOOD!
There were far too many people to fit into a kitchen or dining room. Some ate in the living room watching TV and if your kitchen was like mine there was a portable TV in there too & it was often on amidst "thirty five"shouting, yelling, talking, laughing LOUDLY at the same time...and back in the day SMOKING...at the table.
TRADITION!
You think this is the way it always will be. Some come. Some go. But TRADITION is always there.
The reality is traditions die...like family.
After my mother at 73 years old died in 1988 our family Sunday dinner traditions also died. Everyone went their own way.
Her sister, my Aunt Clara like my mother had Sunday Dinners too. She lived into her mid 90's. The upswing to longevity is life itself however you also outlive your peers and with them TRADITION.
Family moves on. The table once as crowded with food as the "crowd," inside was often empty. Maybe a small meal for one or two maybe a handful but it was nowhere near the TRADITION you recalled. Eventually, everyone stopped coming and the TRADITION dies.
I've tried to regain some of the TRADITION but like those before me it didn't last, in fact it failed. Most don't see the value, if not the need for family traditions. There's often a reason they can't make it but they're often excuses.
Years ago someone would carry on a tradition. Today, it's not important. Maybe they're right. 
Who cares? What's the big deal? It doesn't matter. 
When you lose TRADITION you lose not only what is your family's history but you lose the identity of your family's ancestry if not family itself. 
My kids now adults don't seem to care about carrying on tradition. My grand kids are far removed from what once was. They were born decades after my mother died & years after my aunt passed away.
I hope someday they too can enjoy a TRADITION maybe one started in their home as children or one they create as adults because TRADITION is important. 
MANGIA!

 

My Parents/Grandparents & Nephew Headstones Google Street View Pleasantville NY

There are a number of posts below & throughout this blog pertaining to those who have passed away.
The posts were created to honor them & to know (a little) more about who they were.
However from a research perspective the information is essential for future family members who never knew about them or where they are buried. 

Before I begin you can find Loreto & Maria Cedrone's headstones/cemetery info including most of the children's gravestones here:
https://www.findagrave.com/memorial/112852499/loreto-cedrone

A simple headstone can often provide more critical genealogical information than google!
You may drive by a cemetery without knowing you're driving right by the grave of someone you know. A grave you can easily see from the road.
While most who knew my parents have
passed or moved away there are a "few" locally who may drive right by unaware they're
doing so including driving by David Cuatt's headstone.
My parents are in the second row at All Souls Cemetery on Marble Ave. in Pleasantville NY 10570
Before we detail the google street view if you're driving in to this small cemetery (it's one way) their headstone is in the 2nd row to your left just before you exit. You can easily find them as they are across the street from Irvington St. You can see Irivington St behind them in the 2nd photo below & as fully detailed below the image.

 You can easily see the back of their headstone (currently) thanks to google's street view below.
This view may change as some do but for the last few years as you "drive online" up or down Marble Avenue you can see their headstone. The easiest way to find it is to search for Irvington St.

Google street view may take you "down," Irvington so you may need to "swing around," facing the other way so you're looking at Marble Ave & the cemetery as shown.
Looking straight ahead  behind the cemetery fence in the second row you'll see two black or darker headstones. My parents headstone is between the two as shown by the red arrow & as you can clearly see looking through the fence with the orange arrows.
When you're on Marble Avenue depending on your direction as shown below you will be just passing or approaching the cemetery exit. There is also a large oak tree as shown below just before/after the exit. The headstone is easily visible as you drive by in your car or online.
 
 









We live in a time where we can each "see," one another online or on the phone.
I can also travel to Pleasantville to "visit," my parents in less time than it takes to physically drive up n' down Marble Avenue. 
I have also made my mother's parents 
Loreto & Maria (Cellucci) Cedrone & my father's mother Grazia (Gentile) Tocci available here including David Cuatt's. 
David was the son of (my sister) Diane & her husband George Cuatt.
Click on each photo to better read the captions.
However I noticed in the first photo below the caption is too small to read. I have explained it here:
Standing at my parents gravestone walking
towards the two identical monuments below the dark arrow (They are identical to the monument seen to the left) continuing past them crossing the pavement you'll approach the back of the Grandparent headstones as shown & explained in the 2nd & 3rd photos below.

You can also easily find the Grandparent headstones driving in (it's one way) as you approach the monuments as shown by the yellow arrow the front of your car will be facing towards facing towards the headstones. You can see my car further down in the photo directly above.
David Cuatt was the son of my sister 
Diane (Tocci) Cuatt.
As you look at the cemetery on Marble Avenue there is a side street named Castleton Street

If you're standing on Castelton you can see David's smaller headstone between two larger in the first row as shown below & as you can
see Castelton St is directly behind it.

If you're driving in the cemetery David is in the first row to your right just before you exit.

LOOK OVER THERE TO YOUR RIGHT!

Ahhh! 
To make the blog more visually appealing I linked to your right photos & documents in slide show albums running all the way down the right side of the page. 
SEE! THEY SHOULD BE OVER HERE TO YOUR RIGHT

But they're not there are they? 
Are they gone for good? 
Well for the very few of you who can still see them & that would definitely be a select few you can just let the slide shows roll or you could go to the online album when clicking on an image or the link itself.
Most of you can no longer see them because of the infinite changes to google & web browsers. 
This is especially true for the majority of you looking at this
on a mobile device, an example is Smilebox  a site that allows you to create custom slide shows. It appears they may now require you to sign in as opposed to just opening upon clicking the link or some slide shows may no longer be active. I have left the few embedded slide shows & they are clearly labeled Smilebox within the various posts because it was easier than reformatting the post with the many other links featured within.
EVERYTHING IS STILL ONLINE.
ALL THE PHOTOS/DOCUMENTS ARE LINKED BELOW:
I do hope you'll scroll this blog enjoying the many stories & memories from the past:
https://sites.google.com/site/loretosfamily/

Death Becomes Us

There are multiple ways to obtain info on relatives who've passed away.
I've used my family as an example.

Some have archived or active obituaries. Never trust a link! I've seen many a link
"disappear," when the need to keep that source active is no longer assumed to be of
importance, or it's been moved to another link making it difficult to locate or sold to another party.

Remember too a nickname is not a name. My father was referred to as Frank, but he
is officially listed as Americo. Although Harry born Americo is only known as Harry
except for his birth certificate. The mystery of how he became Harry died with him.

We are moving towards a paperless society which is dangerous. One major hack & it's "all gone."
If you find info you want to keep at the very least print it.

You may not find many a relative because they died before social security became the
"identifier," for your life's file or because records were not kept. They may be listed on paper in the
town where they were born/died or married.

Donald is buried on the property so he also becomes more invisible on certain sites since he is
not documented through church/town records.

1. Obituaries.

My Family Examples of Online Obituaries:
doug: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/lohud/obituary.aspx?n=douglas-l-tocci&pid=150059052
diane: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/lohud/obituary.aspx?n=diana-cuatt&pid=149641244
george: http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/lohud/obituary.aspx?n=george-p-cuatt&pid=150057939
donald has the most because he was the last to pass away:
http://beecherflooksfh.com/book-of-memories/1817478/Tocci-Donald/view-donations.phphttp://www.legacy.com/obituaries/lohud/obituary.aspx?pid=170003946http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/name/donald-tocci-obituary?pid=1000000170003946&view=guestbook

clara's is still active but dan's is no longer:
http://boleafuneralservices.com/obituaries/obit_view.php?id=644

barbara arpie fusco:
http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/ctpost/obituary.aspx?n=barbara-fusco&pid=172065774&

When searching family most stop after finding "relatives," forgetting or not caring about the spouse or kids.
Searching for them better identifies that part of your family, otherwise you have only 1/2 the information.
An example of this is barbara's husband joe:
http://www.legacy.com/obituaries/ctpost/obituary.aspx?page=lifestory&pid=170806585

2. www.sortedbyname.com

This website uses data from multiple sites mostly using social security numbers to create lists. Search your family here:
http://sortedbyname.com/mobile/pages/t128793.html


3. www.deathfigures.com

Yeah i know the name sounds awful but 
it's the best looking site with general information about your relatives 
& your last name.
You'll notice the average lifespan for persons with our last names
is in the mid 70's. Obviously this is skewed as most lifespan data is generated
from older generations who died younger:

I found most of the Cedrone siblings. I search only the sibling not spouses
or children to keep it simple.
Nancy nor Ann were found. I also searched Annunziata & Antoinette. 
Clara has not yet been added.

mom:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?id=To-8693362
dad:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?q=americo+tocci
doug:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?id=To-10266836
doug's grand daughter amy:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?id=To-5758747
diane:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?id=Cu-13093898
george:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?id=Cu-7505368
harry:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?id=Ce-6758168
vi:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?id=Ar-5252081
sid:
http://www.deathfigures.com/index.php?id=Ce-10672768

www.findagrave.com

This site is made up of volunteers who
are often not related to the deceased.
They add gravestone info & photos at random
I contributed my parent's to this site the rest linked below were added by strangers although Clara & Dan's may have been a Marini family member. I also added a new photo to their link showing the updated stone (After Clara passed away) as well as a better photo of my grandparents headstone which is linked on my parents page
My Parents Headstone plus Clara & Dan's followed by Harry & Edna. I have no idea why the person who photographed Harry's headstone didn't clean it before doing so. 
The last link is the Camilli Mausoleum where Nancy & family are interned although only Carmela, Peter & Nancy's first born is listed 
The other siblings, Vi & Ann are not found online & as of this date Sid (Salvatore) is still
"residing," in an urn at home:
https://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSmcid=48368560&GRid=179704595& 


My Parents Headstone Google St View: 
OUTLINED ABOVE IN THE POST SHOWCASING THEIR HEADSTONES EASILY VIEWED FROM MARBLE AVE.

Marini/Cedrone/Camilli Below:

https://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSln=Marini&GSfn=donato&GSbyrel=all&GSdy=2006&GSdyrel=in&GSst=21&GScntry=4&GSob=n&GRid=83001493&df=all&

https://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSln=cedrone&GSbyrel=all&GSdyrel=all&GSst=10&GScntry=4&GSob=n&GRid=107137664&df=all&

 https://www.findagrave.com/cgi-bin/fg.cgi?page=gr&GSln=camilli&GSbyrel=all&GSdyrel=all&GSst=36&GScnty=2037&GScntry=4&GSob=n&GRid=38808696&df=all& 

In The End It Doesn't Matter

In the end it doesn't matter. 
In the post below I shared "tons," of new family images:

https://photos.google.com/share/AF1QipMZaO1GqsYcSw2753nqdMhCeN4XdyAa2CE6I739-9_IUWHz4j_2dBCtJIIOXqTeCw?key=aHVYX09zSkNfeG8wdHN1eGx3elZrRVpKVXVnc25B

Photos from original negatives most if not all have never before seen. NEVER!
No one said a word. 
How is it possible not one family member seeing these for the first time 70+ years later have no reaction? 
Not a call (Call? Who calls anymore?)
Not an email/text.
Not a comment on this blog (but that's expected since few visit here) or on facebook. 
In the end it doesn't matter.
Like life itself it doesn't matter. 
Life? 
You have health problems. Do you think most care. I mean really care? NO!
Do you know what they DO care about. Traffic. How much traffic there is on the way to your wake. But what's most important? The "luncheon" following your funeral. In the end you're less important than what's for dinner!
You pass away. 
Family/friends mourn for a moment if you're lucky.
As services become less traditional with one day funerals less make the effort to attend. 
In fact it's believed funerals will become limited to a select few with more "viewing," online. 
After you're gone life quickly moves on. 
But unlike years ago where you weren't saturated inundated & self absorbed with your cell phone putting it first & foremost in your life people were more inclined to remember you. 
Today? You're like a post/tweet/text...quickly buried by the next one 
In the end I've realized all of this doesn't matter:

https://sites.google.com/site/loretosfamily/

If I died today a few might mourn but don't kid yourself they'll still be thinking...
WHERE SHOULD WE GO OUT TO EAT OR WHERE'S THE LUNCHEON AFTERWARD? 
Think I'm wrong? Think of every person you
know who has passed away. Sure if it's a parent or sibling maybe a close friend you might think about them every so often but overall the majority of those gone rarely come to mind. 
That's reality.    
Your life like all of the media linked above would eventually fade away.
Life goes on (as it should) but what does not go on is the memory of you. As the years pass you become less visible in the minds of those who knew you.
Eventually those who knew you best will also pass away & with them goes what little memory there was of you & them.  
In the end all of this doesn't matter.
See ya'